8/6/15

My Life of Crime: Assault in the Capital

Adams Morgan, Washington, D.C., Midnight-ish.

It cost 35 cents to have me killed. At least, that was the joke.

The homeless guy wanted money and my buddy gave him some change. I didn't. Then things escalated.

The homeless man said my friend had "a bigger heart than the rest of you combined." He called me racist. He said I deserved to die. He'd killed before, in Nam, and wouldn't hesitate to do it again. Especially a racist like me.

Around the third time he threatened to kill me, a nearby bouncer appeared saying, "Jimmy, what are you doing?" He flagged down a cop car and within seconds they were running through traffic, guns out, yelling, "Drop the knife!" Before I could move Jimmy was splayed across the hood of a car, frisked, and cuffed.

The Assistant D.A. called it assault with a deadly weapon. Jimmy was forced into a veterans home.  

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